| | First I want to congratulate Germ and Atreyu for brining a new life into the world. Raise her well guys.
Also,
I have another shout out to give, which is to my OTHER long lost sister
Kristin. She lives in Australia. . . I swear to god, I’m not lying!
Thanks for reading my xanga sis!
Otaku: A wild beast capable
of disguising itself as a normal person. The otaku watches and reads
anything in Japanese, giving the beast an almost certain delusion that
it belongs in Japan or believes that it is Japanese. When hunting, an
Otaku sneaks around, listening for an anime related word such as manga.
When a suitable prey is found, the otaku ravages its prey with useless
information about anime. In worst case scenarios, they spoil plots. The
otaku prefer females, in which case they attack ferociously, offering a
sign of superiority in the knowledge of anime and manga. Otaku are
dangerous animals, keep back with a long stick.
Do I hate hardcore anime fans? … Sometimes ^^;
It’s
not that I hate hardcore anime fans, but sometimes they just get on my
nerves. Take for instance !@#$. !@#$ peeked over at my computer screen
one day at the Rutgers Internet Café, and happened to spy the word BECK
on my google search. In all honesty, there’s many different things that
BECK could be. BECK could be a dog, or a new age singer, or worse, a
refrigerator. However, this BECK was anime related and !@#$ just
happened to see it. And thus, the wildest battle of my life began.
!@#$
begins to talk about Beck in a casual manner, like one would talk about
sports or the weather. However as the conversation continued, his
appearance began to change slightly. I could see the color of his skin
getting darker, his eyes turning red like blood. And as !@#$ continued
to speak, fur grew from his arms. As the conversation drifted away from
Beck, that’s when the teeth began to show. Suddenly, I was attacked!
The otaku started to verbally bite and claw at me, howling from time to
time to alert those around him that I was a victim. Some of the
greatest plot twists in anime were spoiled, and the honor of some of my
most beloved titles were tarnished with his obscure opinions.
As
my armor of patience +5 began to crack, someone comes to my aid. The
vision of EQgirl slowly approaches from the distance of the Rutgers
Internet Café. I’m saved, a partner to combat this 3vi1. However, as I
call EQgirl’s name and she comes running to help me, a grave
underestimation brought by the negligence to acquire knowledge of the
behavioral habits of otaku hit home. What anime chicks are to Otakus
are like what an injured gazelle is to a lion; dinner and a show. With
the proverbial “Hi, what’cha guys talkin about? Anime? I love anime!”
EQgirl had just leaped into the lion’s mouth. My attention gained from
the Otaku began to wane. I used my greatest social weapons to gain the
beasts attention, but it was too late, those blood shot eyes diverted
away from me. I had lost Aggro. . .
Watching a white mage get
mauled by a high level mob was not a pretty picture. EQgirl didn’t
stand a chance with her low experience level. Even I, who once thought
of himself as a high level anime fan have been minuscule by this
Otaku’s great experience. At times I was jealous but most over, I was
annoyed at being attacked. If only such a force was on the side of
good. Poor EQgirl, if I didn’t know any better, it seemed as if she was
going to give up. Slowly she crept behind me, holding on to my arm,
waiting for the intense attacks to stop.
“What anime do you watch?”
“Blah blah blah ---What else?”
“Blah blah blah ---What else?”
“Blah blah blah ---What else?”
EQgirl
was losing the battle, as I tried to gain some attention, using a
combination of provoke and powerful attacks, but I was mostly ignored.
EQgirl started to give me the silent single to run away and med, so I
pulled my 2hour technique:
“Umm hey EQgirl don’t you have class right now?”
“Oh yeah, walk with me?”
“No problem.”
As ran away, the Otaku tried to follow, but seeing as we were quicker than the beast, we narrowly escaped death.
“Thanks for saving me back there EQgirl.” I said to her as we walked to class.
“If I had known he was THAT crazy, I would have left you there.” She replied in a sarcastic way.
Otaku … *shudder* |
| | Posted 3/25/2005 4:33 AM - 3 Views - 2 eProps - 1 Comment
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